This one likes a good penis joke

on the plane;
Frances - Are those nuts in your pocket (in a seductress voice)
Mom - hahahaha i bet you've used that one before

and there was that comment she made about my birthday card.
i pointed out the badly drawn breasts on the woman.
and she pointed out that they look like sad penises, then claimed that she didn't say penises and asked what kind of penises i was looking at.

good thing i spend a lot of time at bars so my parents expect this of me.