what do i do at work

i am working from 7:45 until 5. and i am in the classroom for 3 to 5 hours of that time. so what am i supposed to do with the other time?

well i suppose i should plan for the next lessons, but that takes like 10 min. unless i choose to do an elaborate plan, which i never do because that would lead to disappointment when they don't get it. so i prefer to go in with little planning and be pleasantly surprised.

there are these forms that we have to fill out to record our teaching i try to write slowly to take up more time. and then i have to fill out the online attendance thing when i'm done teaching for the day. that takes 4 minutes, unless the internet is slow then maybe 12.

i have to keep my desk clear, since i failed the first desk inspection. i didn't know they would be checking the drawers and i had loose papers in them. so that takes a little time to be organized.

i give the kids lots of stupid homework so that i will have something to occupy myself - ie take my sweet time grading that shit.

i spend a lot of time eating. we get an hour lunch break, but that doesn't take up enough of my free time, so i walk and get snacks at other breaks i have. and i eat and make phone calls to the people i know will be awake.

with the remaining time i dick around on the internet...when it's working.
i try to avoid fbook since my bosses sit directly behind me in the office.
i look up quotes, listen to http://www.themusiciv.com/the-music-iv-player/, spend some time on cnn, today i just discovered jango and i've been listening to jim gaffigan, i look up teaching plans and activities, read blogs, look up art, read about pop culture. i write emails. i stare into microsoft word at old documents.

sometimes i journal or make lists in my notebook so it looks like i'm producing something. in reality i am making lists of all the bars i've been to and who i went with and what i drank. or remembering quotes from people. or listing what i want my dad to bring me from america.

and then with the remaining time i stare in the distance.

i can write a bar guide for chiang mai

i was unaware i had been to so many bars in Chaing Mai, until it was pointed out to me...

1. Small House
2. One Love
3. Spicy
4. Zoe in Yellow
5. Cafe del Sol
6. Rasta Cafe
7. Heaven Beach
8. The trippy reggae place near zoe
9. Riverside 1
10. Riverside 2
11. the Good view
12. The Brasserie
13. Blar Blar Bar
14. Augus
15. Dukes
16. Pinocchio
17. Monkey Club
18. Warm-up
19. Mo-C Mo-L
20. that one restaurant/bar we went to to celebrate graduating
21. the irish pub
22. the place near tapae gate entrance
23. smile bar
24. reggae bar
25. rooftop bar
26. Barroloco
27. Northgate jazz bar
28. Domdum
29. Danyli
30. Zoe in Yellow Garden
31. ba ba go go bar
32. blues 7
33. guesthouse
34. drunken flower
35. john's place
36. cue ball
37. my home - bar not really my home
38. the hut house place
39. dawan dang
40. 2nd floor
41. chaing mai bar
42. CU Corner
43. Ikko yino
44. The Glass Onion
45. fabrique

this is dream frances

Mally :
Frances

I had a dream about you

It was strange

We were hanging out with Bill at his lake house, you met him randomly while he was filming a movie and he was in Thailand, and you guys became good friends.
And then you really wanted Hot Tamales, like the candy.
And so you got some and wanted him and I to eat them too, and Bill wouldn't cause he said it was too hot and you smacked him and called him a sissy...I just laughed.
Yep and then we watched The Hand that Rocks the Cradle

Did they end up together?

Did Claire and Bender end up together when they were back at school?

Eh no. Yes, they shared a passionate kiss and they both wanted it really bad. There may have been some times that they hung out, maybe there were a couple of times when they were at the same party or bar. and there was always the sexual tension between them. but they never became boyfriend-girlfriend. and there were probably other encounters between them, forbidden touches if you will. but no sex. and they def hardly spoke to each other at school. it was just too weird. and they had their places.

if they did meet regularly for breakfast as a group then yes, a relationship might have blossomed, but since that is just the name for detention (the breakfast club - thank you mally) it didn't.

if you were on the titanic and it was sinking would you fight

I've had dreams about falling - like every night.

the most intense - the one where I died. I fell for a while and then I hit. I hit and I sunk in. and I was gone.

Dreams about falling supposedly happen when you feel a loss of control in life. ok I get that. but if I let myself fall in the dreams then I am ok with no control, no?

"not even animal planet does it for me anymore"

Kyle - frances. you know what happened at work today?

Frances - did you get bit again

Kyle - no worse. a dog tried to hump my leg. and i just kept trying to walk away from him but he just kept following me around the room, trying to grab my leg.

Frances - ew

Kyle - yeah. it went on for like 10 minutes. he eventually got side tracked trying to hump another dog which was a lot better from my point of view point of view sounds weird. like i watched. i didnt watch i just wanted to clarify.

i'm in between stages

Culture Shock Stage 2: Denial

You are caught between the positive vacation feelings and newer negative feelings stemming from having to face the reality of living here for two or three years. You are still excited but somehow the feelings are more forced. For many, the initial reaction is to deny the negative feelings, or starting to feel that you must be doing something wrong because of course you should be excited.

Culture Shock Stage 3: Anger

Attempts to deny have failed. Now the negative feelings come flying out in ugly chunks. You begin to dwell on the negative aspects of life in the host country. You feel unsure, anxious about the future. You feel like you don't deserve this; your experience abroad should be a daily diet of PBS-like discovery.

I've found in myself that this stage is often triggered by some bad day-like event that instead of seeing as one of those things, I instead blame on the host country. Trains can run late anywhere in the world, but if you find yourself saying “Those darn [INSERT DEROGATORY TERM FOR HOST COUNTRY PEOPLE] can't even get a train to run on time” you are thick into this stage.

Next is Escape

Then Depression.

Fuck